Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
I just slapped my cat in the face with my dildo. You were the only one I could tell.
He probs deserved it.
Every good man does.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
Dude, she set my Tinder preference to men, set the radius to 100 miles, and used up all of my right swipes. I think she's mad.
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
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