I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
Thanks for ditching me last night. I got a ride home from the Dominos delivery guy. You owe me 3 large pizzas.
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
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