Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
When I came home you were watching infomercials, eating croutons out of the box and salsa from a funnel. Well done.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
SShout out to Barney the Dinosaur for teaching me how to sing the ABCs backward. I just scored a free pitcher.
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
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