I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
He was using OnStar to get directions to the bar. I'm pretty sure he'd have gotten her number too if I hadn't disconnected the call.
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
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