I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
You were convinced you would hurt my car if you opened the door. Then you barfed in the pretzle bucket Peter gave you
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
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