You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
all but 2 of were put on probation for disorderly conduct. i know, visiting a hospital when your drunk is really stupid but it seemed like such a good idea at the time
swear to god, "it seemed like a good idea at the time" is gonna be on your epitaph
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
Randomize
