I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
Randomize
