Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
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