Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
You slammed your face into the toilet and declared you were moving your bed into the bathroom in the morning. Also, you insisted on crawling everywhere because feet are "overrated."
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
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