He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
I could have mohawked her pubes.
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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