They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
So i guess my mom went into the kitchen and asked me why i was making mac and cheese at 4 in the morning and apparently i yelled at her to "get the fuck back bitch you don't know my life"
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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