i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
Is a Chipotle burrito an acceptable "sorry I ran over your cat" gift?
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Randomize
