Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
Ketchup is God's man juice
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
You peed on a flamingo?!?
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
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