you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
Randomize
