This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
I was 40 minutes late to work today because I was getting fucked. Walked in to discover that it's apparently performance review day. Employee of the year.
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
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