Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
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