i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Randomize
