please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
Randomize