I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
Randomize
