so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH
budget cuts
YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS
budget cuts are serious business
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
Randomize
