Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize
