She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
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