dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
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