I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
Randomize
