Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
Somehow I magically turned down a threesome last night. On my birthday. You're a horrible wingman.
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Randomize
