I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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