Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
Randomize
