$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
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