Left my ID again and at a Giant's game. This is the second time they accepted my handgun safety certificate as proof of ID to buy beer.
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
Randomize
