So explain to me again how you wake up next to a Brazilian model and I wake up next to a turkey sub? And a jar of grey poupon.
omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
Randomize
