before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
It's amazing how hard it it while drunk to not comment "fuck you" on dumb peoples' statuses
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
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