Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
I wish they made helmets for livers.
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
Randomize