i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
There's a naked man in my car right now.
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
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