Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
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