u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
