Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
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