'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
I woke up to an email from Groupon for 3 laser lipo treatments...on Valentine's Day...way to kick me when I'm down Groupon.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
I turned on Elf, made myself a mojito, and am eating one of a sleeve of Ritz. You tell me if I wanna go out tonight.
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
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