3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
Randomize
