And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
My mom is making me buy a single zucchini, I look like someone who can't afford a dildo
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
Randomize
