My hair reeks of homosexuality.
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
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