Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
your like the ambassador to my penis.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
Randomize
