I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
love makes seman taste better
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
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