You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
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