just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
I'm eating animal crackers on my bed next to my vibrator writing about the hopelessness and depravity of humanity. I am LIVING.
I prefer to think of hangovers as extreme sobriety, which can only be cured by more booze
Randomize
