he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
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