super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
"Functional." Your standards for how you feel after drinking are so high.
When your night starts by chugging margarita and drinking vodka out of tupperware, I feel it's best to stay realistic.
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
Randomize
