He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
Randomize
