The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
Randomize
