i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
The beer is more important than you right now.
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
So I just went to clothing optional bar
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
Randomize
