addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
I found an industrial strength sharpie in the drawer so I started writing BONER JAM 2014 on everyone's foreheads so they kicked me out
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
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